Tuesday, March 4, 2014

On Honoring Gifts

Sooo…I thought I wanted to take a super extended blog/social media break, but I changed my mind. What I have to say can’t wait and maybe soon you'll understand why I can't afford to take a break. All we ever have is now.

It would kill me if I chose to not utilize what I’ve been given.  How do I know?  Because I die every time I see someone not use the tools and gifts they have to their advantage, in both a metaphysical and literal sense. What is the point of having an expensive camera and not take pictures? What’s the point of having an eye for something and not trusting it as a strong suit?  Too many people take what they have, even the smallest of things, for granted and up until recently, I’ve definitely been one of them.

Hidden in the crevices of our cabezas are amazing and powerful God-given tools, there to drive us and generations to come into a brighter future. It dawned on me that I wasn’t truly honoring those gifts nor the people who fought for me to have this freedom to express myself the way I can and to be a voice. Too often, outer psyche creates these blockages and limitations that won’t allow us to move beyond labels and expectations others have placed on us.   So then, our minds become this place for F.E.A.R. (False Evidence Appearing Real) to inhabit and we stay stuck in the funk out of slavery to contentment.   


For a long time, I’ve been so scared to promote what I want to write…on MY blog, do what I want to do..in MYlife.  Fear of rejection. Fear of failure. Fear that no one will like it or worse yet, fear that they won’t like me.  Fear that no one would read it the way I intended for something to be read.  All sorts of fears came in to play when I would sit down to get my thoughts and plans out.  After enough drafting and deleting, before I know it, I’d spent hours allowing my fears to rationalize what I wasn’t writing, what I wasn’t doing. How crazy is that?  And then I get emails, praising how honest and open I am. Uhh….thanks (?).  It’s an awkward position to be in, to say the least.

But I had something like an epiphany that almost made me want to delete my entire blog (again) and start over, but I’ll keep it all here, because it is all a part of the journey.  If I want to be honest in my pursuits and create out of a place of truth, I have to eliminate that fear and keep writing with the courage to say what I want to say.  Today is a new day (isn't it ironic Sunday I'll be undergoing water baptizism?), a religious practice for some, but for me, it's a lovely reminder of renewal and purpose. I have to stop bullying myself into thinking that I’m not good enough to stand out without conforming to the norm.  I have to free myself in order to be boldly authentic. Lastly, I have to really believe that what I am put on this earth to do matters. In other words, it’s about to get real.  Oh and guess what I did today?? Did you guess? Okay, hold on to that thought and I'll come back to it at a later time. 

I’ll end with this: Don’t allow your mind to work against you.  Your mind, your thoughts, are so magnifying and potent.  You know the common thread of science, astrology, spirituality,  and even religion? The same reason why the stars align in a way that determines our personality is the same reason why we are able to pray and receive answers from an invisible (but very real) God.  It all supports the ideal that the power of the universe is also in your mind.  Although they all have different ways to express it, trust that it’s being said. 

Have you ever had a prolific aha moment that totally shifted your perspective of things?  How did it change you?   Did it encourage you to continue on a particular path or go along with a new direction?  

I would love to hear your personal stories, as they all empower me and everyone else who reads this.
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5 comments

  1. Don’t allow your mind to work against you. -- yes to this. over thinking is what stops me the most. I'm proud you recognize your gift and aren't stopping yourself from reaching your full potential!

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  2. So inspired by reading this, Chymere. My focus lately has been living fearlessly and I have some of the same fears you have mentioned above. Some days I want to be bold and share, but many days I become paralyzed with fear. Over and over I have to face myself in the mirror and profess that I will step out on faith and get over the madness. I actually have a little something I'm gonna share over on the blog next week about it. Thanks for shining your light and sharing your gift with us. It's soooo freeing, isn't it?

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  3. This is very inspirational. Fear is so strongly embedded in our lives. Finding our voices is the first step to fighting it. This is something I struggle with often and it is kind of weird when people like me for my honesty, but in reality I'm holding so much back.

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  4. fear is learned meaning it can be un-learned.
    i'm happy you've decided against taking a hiatus :)

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  5. Good read! Thanks for these words, Chymere. I can relate. For a long time i was afraid to share my drawings because--who am I? i don't have an illustration degree, and i'm mostly self-taught (my mind working against me). Even though people seemed to like my work, i still had to remind myself that "I AM an artist' (and i still do). Even in sharing my art i still tend to rationalize the fear of sharing something too raw by convincing myself that i'm just "editing". I'm working on a collection of drawings that I will release in the coming month for my shop (you heard it first) and I'm really excited about it and about putting myself out there as an artist. Again, thank you for these words and congrats on your baptism!

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