Sunday, July 6, 2014

Love Your Reflection From All Angles

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The 6 word story: "Love your reflection from all angles." -Alicia Keys

Well said, Alicia. 

Too often, we get wrapped up in what/how/who others think we should be, too tied down to the labels people have aimlessly thrown our direction. That vortex of trying to be anything outside of who we are in an attempt to "fit", to be inhibited by the shackles of society, is a dangerous place to dwell in. Compromise, in that aspect, doesn't benefit us in any way. We are all multi-dimensional. Our finger prints are not unique so that we can live our whole lives being robots; they are unique because we were not designed to be boxed in. Our brains are wired differently so that we all have something special to contribute the world. It took a while for this theory to totally register and at times, I like to forget. However, I am still learning-more and more- how to love every single cell of me equally. 

What I mean is, life (for the living) is about embracing who you are on every level by.
  1. Celebrating and learning all there is to learn about your heritage. My family is one big melting pot of cultural groups. Even with all the interracial love that has transpired, I never knew much about my roots and could never properly explain to peers how I identify myself. Honestly, I didn't realize the importance of the connection. All I knew was mulatto and was always taught how to be color blind when it comes to love. Recently, my dad and I have been conducting research to discover our ancestry on my paternal blood line. The coolest thing was discovering that I'm Ghanaian, which brought a fresh perspective and has now become a major part of me to love and celebrate. 
  2. Honoring your spiritual beliefs. My spiritual beliefs are enforced by staying in tune with my own divinity and uncovering my own truth. I do believe I God and consider myself to be of the Christian faith. However, when it comes to others, it's not my mission to convert or judge, but to simply love. I could probably write an entire post about religion and my spiritual journey. Perhaps I will one of these days. In a nutshell, I do believe that we all have different paths, different ways that connect to a higher force, and I don't believe anyone has the right to determine what's right and wrong in that sense. Namaste
  3. Loving your physical appearance. Let's face it: at some point in every girl's life, she has had issues with self-image, including me.  One example of this is how much I used to loath my upper womanly parts also known as breast. All throughout junior high and high school, I would do everything in my power to try to hide what I considered to be large, unnecessary lumps of meat. 'Swimmers don't have big breast,' I'd think to myself as I find new methods to awkwardly conceal them. Although that wasn't the only thing I didn't like about myself physically, I'm finally at a place where I love the whole creation and show that by working on what can be approved and accepting what can't.
  4. Doing things you love, things that make you happy. My definition of doing what you love is to enjoy all personal interest and to invest in the subjects that matter to you, openly and shamelessly. So what if you don't have enough rhythm? So what if you're mocked for your geeky obsessions? So what if the world doesn't accept the person or the way you choose to love? As my favorite slogan states: Just do it. This doesn't necessarily mean to be defined by what you do; it's all about finding time, space, and energy in your life for the things that matter to you and not wasting time worried about what everyone else has to say about it. 9/10, the people who are most likely to have an opinion are the ones who wish they had the courage and the audacity to be true to who they are.
  5. Not allowing mental defects, learning disabilities, or any other diagnose to hinder you from moving forward. Of all these pearls, this lesson is one that stands out the most, because for so long I felt trapped by conditions I felt were permanent. This was one of the reasons why college was so stressful for me initially. During a certain era in my life, I didn't really believe I could overcome a lot of things, and was, therefore, limited in what I could accomplish. Other people believing in me meant nothing if I refused to believe in myself. My strength in finally applying it came from hearing amazing stories about people who dealt with worse, but, in the end, came out victorious-in spite of. 
  6. Last, but not least, trust the process. The best analogy I have for this: 'Rome wasn't built in a day' and was actually destroyed and rebuilt several times. We're talking about one of the greatest standing historical monuments of all time here.  With that said, it's not realistic to wake up one morning with all the answers. Everything's Eventual, meaning everything thing works out, eventually (Stephen King reference, for those of you who are unfamiliar). A lot of us are constantly perusing the next big thing/moment/deadline, but trusting is all about being present and having the will power to not try to control the timing...of anything, in any way; it's working, but still allowing things to happen in their natural order, rather than rushing to the end result. 
I didn't learn any of this over night and a lot of it is still being learned. It took me a while to free fall in love with who I am from every point of view, but, the point is, I'm finally falling and I have a long way to go. Hopefully sharing tidbits of my story will inspire someone with similar struggles and serve as some sort of catalyst for change in their life. 

♥ Chymere A.
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