Friday, April 24, 2015

Easy, Breezy...

It's always an adventure when Sheriden and I link up. She's the kind of person who carries this kind of genuine energy that forces one to see life in beautiful colors and is always hopeful about what the day has in store. It's just all around good vibes with her and it's been that way since the day we met.     
As some of you may have figured out from the hints I've thrown out into the social media abyss, I recently relocated to another state. As exciting as it was to finally move out, I honestly felt like a little kid again, because it's sad to be so far away from the people I'm used to spending so much time with, but I'm thankful for the memories. 

While reminiscing, I found pictures from one of our many impromptu photo sessions from spring 2014 that I neglected to post on my blog. Actually, I was saving these photos for a magazine project I was working on at the time, that I never officially re-launched. I adore these photos, because not only did I love my outfit this particular day, she managed to capture moments that so effortlessly expressed simple, carefree bliss and fun times with an amazing friend, despite how awkward I tend to be in front of the camera.  And since I never shared this OOTD, figured I would pull out a wildcard, for memories sake.

♥ Chymere A.



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Tuesday, April 21, 2015

Inspired

It's 5 o'clock in the morning and the creative juices are flowing like crazy. Perhaps, it's because my excitement about life is through the roof and that outburst of elation caught me completely off guard. Wonderful things are happening and the energy flowing within and around me is too vibrant to ignore. I don't think it's an accident that as my relationship with God is deepening, my focus is sharpening, and my purpose is becoming clearer. Despite all the bad that has happened in the past/will happen in the future, I can still say with confidence that God is...so good.

Usually when spring time rolls around, I'm excited for the summer. Although I look forward to what summer 2015 has in store, I remain happy about where I am right now and, considering the darkness I've been through over the course of my life, it truly is an amazing feeling to be absolutely appreciative of the present moment. Being present doesn't necessarily imply that I'm not thinking about the future at all; it just means I'm not obsessing over it to the point where the now is being neglected. 

I've curated a word bank of all the things on the horizon, to sort of draw out a theme and keep track of the inspiration behind the direction I'm headed in for the second quarter (April-June) of the year, as far as this blog is concerned:
  • Happiness
  • Music
  • Art
  • Design
  • College
  • Career
  • Engineering
  • Ink
  • Vinyl
  • Projects
  • Ideas
  • Style
  • Transition
  • Pinterest
  • #CarefreeBlackGirl
  • #BeachBabe
  • Fitness
  • Green
Chymere A.
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Sunday, April 19, 2015

Self-Love ♡ Sundays | Guard Your Heart

Being guarded has always felt a bit like an oxymoron. On one hand, this mechanism taught me so many dimensions of the love I have for myself, for others, and the world around me. In that regard, it has been a sort of protective shield, which can be a good thing. On the other hand, I became immune-so numb to the pain of detachment and so doubtful of anything potentially good happening-that I built indestructible walls around my heart that would be able to withstand any storm and would never shake or crumble, making it nearly impossible to open my eyes wide enough see the world in an optimistic light.

For example, there was an era in my life where people came and went so much that it didn't bother me either way after a while. There was no real purpose in trying to build anything with anybody. During this time, I tricked myself into believing it was unrealistic to expect another human being to love someone like me. I simply gave up hope. The isolation kept me so incredibly guarded that I subconsciously blocked the positive along with the negative.

Fortunately and gradually, I was reminded of the vast world that exist right beyond my tough exterior. I was reminded that one day, I would open my heart again and allowing my guards to fall would be well worth the risk. With a renewed sense of hope, I started to hammer cracks in my outer shell to make it easier for others to maneuver pass my defense system, to make it easier for good things to make their way into my life without any doubt or self sabotage. But sometimes, even I couldn't break through all the layers, forcing me to resort back to feeling like my effort wasn't good enough and filling in the cracks I made from the inside.

Anytime I welcome someone or something new into my life, of course I want whatever/whoever it is to stay forever, but I had to learn that it doesn't always work like that. It used to hurt so badly whenever I felt like I "missed out" on a person or an opportunity, because I love so hard and get extremely attached, even if I don't always show or express it. When I seriously grow to love anything, I give it my all. Although it's still a very difficult task for me to be completely open to new possibilities, I try to believe that good things can and will happen. If I feel like a relationship that is meaningful to me is slipping, I try to locate what's wrong and fix it. Rather than viewing my passion as a downfall, I now see it as a kind of superpower I'm still learning how to master.

Instead of rebuilding that wall of steel when my actions are not reciprocated or things don't exactly align the way I see fit, I've come up with a different approach; total surrender, total trust. As I relinquish that false sense of power by control, I am able to love, accept, and move on accordingly, a far shot from where I used to be. I now know that once I've given my best and it's still not enough, I have no other choice but to walk away and give God control over the situation.  This does not imply that I no longer guard my heart; it just means that I don't have to always react to adversity in such a negative way that I create blockage for future blessings, nor do I feel the need to have all the answers, all the control, all the time.

Acceptance is knowing that everyone and every opportunity is not designed for me, which is something I've written multiple times over the course of this self-love journey. Because I am human and I can be foolish sometimes, there will be instances where I choose to not listen to my intuition; it's a process. However, being aware of the differences helps me better decipher the seasonal from the lifetime, the good from the evil, etc. and being careful not to confuse any of the two.

The God-inspired verse said it best in Proverbs 4:23 "Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it." That scripture has been my guiding light in not only relationship matters, but also in life, I guard my heart to prevent toxins and pollution from disturbing my purpose, but not to the point where I am intentionally missing the beauty around/within me. My heart is a sacred place. and although I'm no longer as hellbent as I once was about guarding it, I still think it's very important to remain protective of it.




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Friday, April 17, 2015

Currently

 In Love With: where I am and where I'm being lead spiritually; the intimacy that is constantly expanding between me and God. Establishing and nurturing that relationship becomes even more important as I'm evolving. I'm just so blessed to not only have that connection, but to be able to dwell in it and keep my life structure in accordance to that place.

♥ In Lust With: This watch. These shoes. This outfit. These framesmanufactured using recycled wood from Ghana {pretty dope company--read about the story behind Bôhten Eyewear  {H E R E}

 Currently reading:  'The Best Yes: Making Wise Decisions in the Midst of Endless Demands' by: Lysa TerKeurst 

 Working On:  just overall balance and not stretching myself too thin. Sometimes I have all these great ideas and projects that I want to pursue, that it gets to be overwhelming to the point where I lose focus on whatever it is I'm supposed to be focusing on in that moment. Therefore, I am working on staying calm under pressure and not causing myself unnecessary stress by biting off more than I can chew.

 Favorite Words: "I hold back oceans, just to appear like a river on the surface."-me // At first, I saw that statement in a negative light, but now it serves as a note to self that reminds me of a personal goal I have in regards to who I am becoming as a woman. I used to believe that silent women could not be powerful or would not be respected in their career fields, but I've had quite the change of heart when it comes to that. I could probably write an entire post diving into that, but basically, I desire to be a woman with quite strength, who exemplifies femininity, peace, and serenity at all times...even in the moments I am chaos on the inside. 

 Favorite Visual:  All the pretty flowers coming into bloom!

 Listening to:  There are legit so many albums, songs, discoveries that I have fallen completely in love with; it's been a great year in music already. For the sake of content balance, I haven't even mentioned half of what I've been listening to on the Music Collective series. Right now, I'm really enjoying Cherry Bomb x Tyler, the Creator and Kaytranada, a musician/producer/DJ who is a new discovery for me, so those 2 artist have pretty much been on my radar this week. 

 Over the Moon About: things falling into place. I will be moving out this week, starting a new job next week, and it finally feels like all my hard work and sacrifice are starting to pay off.

 Thinking Of: changing the name of my blog (yes, again) and taking a more personal approach to what I write and how I write. By the time this post is up, the url will probably be new. Per usual, I can only hope that my current readers continue to rock with me through the changes and my audience continues to grow organically. 

 Dreaming Of: blueprints, construction materials, aesthetic details of gorgeous buildings that don't even exist yet. Have I ever expressed how much I love my major? One of the best choices I've made thus far. 

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Saturday, April 11, 2015

Music Collective: vol. 30 {Forever in My Life}


"...Forever in my life, I see you..."

Anyone who knows me-or is at least familiar with my taste in music by reading my blog-understands how much I adore the UK music scene. I absolutely love the Snakehips duo, this song, and the art form of this video made me love it more. It has that vibe that's perfect for those car rides in the summertime with the car windows rolled down. Definitely one of my favorite songs of the moment. Enjoy!

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Wednesday, April 8, 2015

To the Man Who Taught Me How to Love Myself


Me and my dad don't always see eye to eye. Mother darling says it's because we're so much alike. Sure he has his flaws; we all do. Maybe it's not so bad that I take on his light as well as his shadows.
From day one, he continues to do the best he knows how to do sans having an example of a father in his life or any real clue about how to raise a daughter. Given the resources-or lack thereof rather-he did an exceptional job, if I must say so myself. Whenever I forget my worth, as I do from time to time, he reminds me...that I am beautiful. I am resilient. I am fearfully and wonderfully made by the designer of this magnificent universe.
I can never expect for any man to come along and treat me like my dad treats me and my mom. Unfortunately, no one will ever be able to achieve that standard, but if they come close, even halfway, I'd be happy. And that's what he wants for me.
And I know it would've been easier to have left, but thank God he chose to stay... No matter how much I take him for granted, no matter how much I didn't take tough love the way he intended, no matter how many low blows I threw at him with my words of anger and thrashing attitude... He made a vow to not neglect his own family like his dad did, and he's kept that promise to himself and to us. Now that I'm older, I am mature enough to see just how much he sacrificed so that I would experience a better life than he ever had a chance to.
I praise the person he's been to me, despite our differences, because I love him so much and I'm very lucky to have a father, who takes his role to heart. Thank you, daddy, for being my Superman.

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Sunday, April 5, 2015

Self-Love ♡ Sundays | Facing Reality

The thing about clarity is, it doesn't always come wrapped in a pretty package nor is it always delivered under the circumstances of "handle with care". Sometimes reality is a hard kick in the abdomen when you're least expecting it. Despite how painful it may be to accept truth, truth in itself is impossible to run away from and that's life. 

Lately, I admit that I was trying my best to run away from the truth, chasing the delusions drawn by my own imagination. While I was busy living in dreamland, the universe was trying to open my eyes and God was busy trying to protect me from the things I couldn't possibly foresee on my own. Choosing to walk in certain situations blind sighted was doing more harm than good. Just as I was avoiding the negative by escaping my own reality, I was also do a good job at avoiding the positive, and closing myself off from all the good that can only happen if I would learn how to fully release/let go of all that isn't aligned with where I am at this point in my life.

There's a valuable lesson to be learned in putting my heart in places it doesn't fit. One major lesson is a confirmation of what I already know, as I've said this many times over the course of the SLS series: what is meant to be, will be and who God has for me is for me. Somehow, I believed the universe needed my assistance, but boy was I wrong! It re-teaches me that everything happens for a reason. More than anything, it shows me how much I've grown, because instead of mulling over what went wrong, I'm peacefully accepting the things I have absolutely no control over. From here on out, I just have to be able to trust all things organic, all things present and real, and to be completely patient with the process of life unfolding as it should. 

Facing reality doesn't change a thing. I am still unapologetic about who I am and who I allow into my life, past and present; only next time around, I'll know the difference between fantasy and reality, because I am more willing to take responsibility for my inability to discern between the two in the first place.

Pearls of Wisdom: Embrace where you are in this moment. Appreciate the people, opportunities, and resources that are available to you right now. Accept truth and don't try to hold on to anything that isn't for you, so that you are able to clear the necessary space for the blessings that are destined to follow inner peace. Things don't always work out as we planned, but certainly, there is always a higher power working on our behalf.  

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