Thursday, December 14, 2017

What the Netflix series, 'Friends from College' Taught me About Settling

The other night, I was wide awake in the wee hours of the morning, reflecting on life and other things After binge watching the Netflix series, Friends from College, somewhere in between me praying for guidance and stressing about my to-do list, a thought crossed my mind about settling and how often people force themselves to fall in love with the life they have and accept the cards that have been dealt, simply because they didn't end up with the life they actually wanted.

While entertaining, there were a few wildly familiar concepts that the show brought to my attention. It warranted this idea that some decisions we make result in consequences we are obligated to live with forever. On the other hand, some consequences are simply a part of the lesson, where we make a mistake (or make a choice), deal with the repercussions, and are eventually presented with another opportunity to go about things differently. However, more often times than not, the difference between permanent and temporary consequences is a blurred line.

For instance, people will miss out on the love of their life, for whatever reason, and opt for the next best thing. Perhaps, something happened on their individual paths that caused them to walk in different directions, therefore, eventually both parties decide to choose someone else, because life is way too short to wait on things to align perfectly in order for these two people to choose each other, right? However, every now and then, those lingering curiosities pop up and suddenly, the normal routine they've built as the foundation becomes a little less dependable than it once appeared to be. What do we do when we are faced with the daunting questions of what would've/should've/could've happened when there is no way to change what did happen. After awhile, it all becomes utterly exhausting to dwell on, so we either act on it those emotions and risk losing everything, understand the grass isn't always greener and focus on the present moment, or distract ourselves with the life we've already established.

Obviously that example is situational and not everyone thinks like that about their life. Some people are genuinely satisfied with the choices they've made and absolutely content the life they have, but the point is: why is it such a normal concept to settle? Why do we feel like a life that is ours by design is somehow not ours to create? If we want to dig deeper and talk about philosophy that involves spirituality and religion, are we not made in the image of God, the creator of everything? Have we not been given free will? Do we not know that the universe works on our behalf rather than against us?

I don't have the answers, but I have settled enough to know better moving forward. Despite society constantly implying that I should settle and always trying to dictate what should be on my radar at any given moment, that's not what I or anyone else is meant to do with our time here on earth. I am well aware that I can't  possibly control everything and that things don't always go as planned, but I can act as if the universal powers are all on my side, ready to help me shift things the way I see fit. I refuse to submit to lifelong misery, all because I decided not to go after what I wanted. Even if I intentionally travel down that road and allow myself to be guided by the strong pull of what I love instead of fear, it will only lead to having exactly what I want or obtaining something far greater than what I initially envisioned, even considering the mistakes I'm bound to make along the way. And both destinations are equally fascinating in my book.

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Saturday, December 2, 2017

Faith. Finance. Focus. Fitness. [Almost 2018]

A new cycle of 365 days is upon us and no matter how much we try to stray away from creating resolutions, it feels almost unnatural not least for me it does. However, instead of creating this prodigious list of goals to conquer, I go into each year with a theme of sorts. For instance, 2016 was all about consistency, gaining clarity, and protecting my peace. That was the energy I started the year with and the universe met that expectation gradually. 

For 2018, I've come up with 3 words to set the tone for the year: faith, finance, focus, and fitness. My lessons in each department have been on-going and a struggle at times, but it's time - beyond time - to take what I've learned thus far, apply it, and continue to cultivate each area.


Faith is a very personal part of my life, something that varies from person to person. My relationship with God seems to be getting better, deeper, sweeter every moment, but because I am human with doubts, fears, insecurities, and slip and fall like everyone else, it's absolutely one of those things that I have to constantly keep in check. Faith over fear and faith over failure.


Listen...I think we are all finding our way in this department. Obviously, there are people who are doing very well for themselves in their twenties, but for many of us - including myself - managing finances, building credit scores, saving money, etc. is a struggle. The silver lining is the struggle doesn't last forever, so it's a process. And by becoming more financially savvy, I will then be equipped to reach out to educate other people and communities about financial literacy.


An area I struggle with constantly is staying focused. Managing The Sky Box Suite was actually an ambitious project I took on that truly tested my level dedication and consistency. After celebrating 1 full year not too long ago (November 2017, to be exact), I realized just how much I am able to achieve when I dedicate at least one year to consistent effort. Laser focused on all the ambitions I have honestly been so lazy about pursuing, one step at a time. Right now, getting my finances in order is obviously a priority, as well as stepping back into academia, and I know how hard it is to balance both. To accomplish these things, I know I have to get serious, even if it means making a weekly practice to eliminate all distractions (i.e. social media) in order to get things done.


To my final theme, getting back in peak performance shape is going to be the aim this month leading into next year. Typical, but my argument against that is having been an athlete (swimmer) most of my life, so training won't be new territory for me. Aside from overall health, the most important thing about it is making more of an effort to do what I love and swimming has always played a huge role in doing what makes me happy. It's something I've been putting off for a while, so it's long overdue. The second I get the momentum going, I'm good to go, which is why I'm headed to get an early morning workout it at the conclusion of this post.

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